The Eclectic Dabbler

I have a love/hate relationship with the book Love You Forever.

I wasn’t familiar with this book before having children, but it was listed fourth on the 2001 Publishers Weekly All-Time Best selling Children’s Books list for paperbacks at 6.97 million copies (this doesn’t include the 1 million hardcover copies).

Amazon.com describes the book this way:

The mother sings to her sleeping baby: “I’ll love you forever / I’ll like you for always / As long as I’m living / My baby you’ll be.” She still sings the same song when her baby has turned into a fractious 2-year-old, a slovenly 9-year-old, and then a raucous teen. So far so ordinary–but this is one persistent lady. When her son grows up and leaves home, she takes to driving across town with a ladder on the car roof, climbing through her grown son’s window, and rocking the sleeping man in the same way. Then, inevitably, the day comes when she’s too old and sick to hold him, and the roles are at last reversed.

So: The part I “hate” about this book is the psycho mom “driving across town with a ladder on the car roof, climbing through the window, and rocking the sleeping man.”

I’m imagining here: My mother-in-law lives across town from her grown son, and if she ever did that even once (and, of course, I want to be perfectly clear: she wouldn’t!–I’m just sayin’), my husband would be getting a restraining order!

To me, this segment of the book crosses the line of endearing and borders on the insane. I mean, there are places for people like that. While you read the book, you have to wonder if the son doesn’t turn out “fractious”, “slovenly,” and “raucous” because of the mom who coddles him all his life!

Then there’s the part I love, which I suppose all mothers can relate to on some level. The truth is I can’t even read this book without getting teary at the end, when the son comes back to hold his aging mother and sing her the same song she sang to him all those years.

My son Micah turned two years old today.

He’s been sick and grumpy all week (I would be grumpy too if my eyes were alternately oozing–or glued shut). We’ve all been sick. I’ve been sick and incredibly tired. We haven’t gone out much with everyone sick, so it seems like Micah’s been getting into everything. He’s also been more demanding–even defiant this week, which is wearisome.

This morning, for example, we already had three little episodes before 9 AM. It was quiet for a minute, which of course left me wondering, “What is he doing?”

Just then I saw him pull Love You Forever off the shelf and walk toward me, holding the book up over his face where I could see the title.

“Couch?” he called. “Couch?” (His way of saying: “Come sit on the couch and read it to me!”)

I couldn’t resist. He needs more one-on-one time time, I thought. I had verbally edited this book when I read it to Mara, and as I sat down to read it to Micah for the first time, I was wondering which parts I should leave out for him.

As usual, on the very first page, I was drawn personally into the story, reminiscing about the time, just two short years ago, when Micah was my new (very little) baby.

I snuggled him on the couch while I read: “A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang: ‘I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, As long as I’m living my baby you’ll be.’”

I turned the page. The picture there showed a little boy with a big smile, sitting in a bathroom, unrolling the toilet paper, pulling off sections and throwing them in the toilet.

Largely oblivious to the picture, I continued reading, struck by the parallel to my son’s current stage of life, as I read: “The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. . .”

At this point, my two-year-old had a huge–majorly huge–mischievous grin on his face. So much so, that I was nearly convinced he believed this book was written either about–or for–him! Before I could answer my own question of which parts of the story I shouldn’t read to this child (he certainly doesn’t need any more ideas!), Micah hurled himself off the couch, and announced, “Theeeee End!”

As he scampered off, I looked back down at the book: “. . . Sometimes his mother would say, ‘This kid is driving me CRAZY!’ But at night time when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room . . . [and] sang . . . ‘I’ll love you forever. . .’”

Again, with the tears. I just can’t read stuff like this!

I’ll love you forever, Mic, I thought.

I know. I’m pathetic.

And I don’t know why I was surprised less than an hour later when I found him–yes, my two-year-old–standing at the toilet, the paper unrolled on the floor, throwing pieces in, and flushing over and over and over and over. Did I mention he kept flushing?. . . In retrospect, I’m sure that must have looked really fun in the book! (Add “Tacitly encourages aberrant behavior” to my “hate” column.)

What was I thinking reading that book to him?

But tonight. . .

. . . when my two-year-old birthday boy was quiet, I opened the door to his room. . .

‘I’ll love you forever,’ Micah!

Happy 2nd Birthday!

I really don’t want to start potty training Micah yet. Being 37 weeks pregnant, coming off two months of bedrest this week, preparing for a new baby (anytime now!!! or. . . mid-March???) and planning to go to my sister’s wedding in Florida the first week of May (I’m the maid of honor, Mara is a flower girl)–well, I just have plenty of other things to deal with right now!

But part of me feels guilty.

Micah is now 20-months old and showing a great deal of interest in going potty and major awareness of needing to be changed. In fact, when he’s wet or dirty, you better be paying attention! or he’ll take matters into his own hands.

Mara had already started at this age, because she absolutely hated having a dirty diaper, and would run around like crazy as if trying to escape it. . . In hindsight, I feel like I let Mara start potty training too early, and that caused the whole process to be a lot worse than it needed to be. Her constipation issues also complicated things, but probably if we’d waited she would have done better. And I don’t want to make the same mistakes with Micah.

Besides, he still seems so much younger! Today, for the first time, I heard him say the colors “pur-pur [purple],” “lah-lah [yellow],” and “reh [red].” He just seems so much younger than Mara did as this age–I’m sure it’s just a boy/girl, verbal/nonverbal thing. . . but back to signs of “potty readiness”. . .

I laugh when he pulls his pants down (or off) and lays on the floor to be changed. If that’s not trying to communicate, I don’t know what is! He will stand in the bathroom, while Mara’s on the potty, unrolling toilet paper for her and handing it to her (and yes, I know that’s not a sign, but it makes me laugh too!). Before he goes in his diaper, he will walk around pulling on the front of his pants–he knows it’s coming–then afterwards, he will say ‘diaper, diaper’ and try to go up the stairs to his room to be changed.

This morning, he was walking around, saying, “Poop! Poop! Poop!” and pulling down his pants and his diaper.

For awhile (over the last couple of months), I ignored this kind of behavior, because I figured he was just mimicking things he heard Mara say or do.

But I’m starting to realize: he knows what he’s doing. And he’s trying to tell me something!

I did bring the little potty back up from the basement again–just for these occasions. I figure it doesn’t hurt to at least familiarize him with the little potty concept, if he’s going to be sooo insistent that he needs to go!

So I sat him on the potty for about five minutes, while he beckoned for me to bring him various toys. (Ha ha!) But nothing happened, so I just decided that he didn’t really need to go, and I put his diaper back on and sent him back to play.

About ten minutes later, Daniel walked in the house, pointed at the kids in the living room and said, “One of them reeks!”

Sure enough, it was Micah with a major MAJOR poopy diaper! (Thanks to my dear husband for changing that one!!!!)

Micah really is beginning to understand, but Mom is not ready.

So I can plan to add potty training to this summer’s activities, after my sister’s wedding in May. . .

woo-HOO!

My three-year-old, adding a whole new dimension to Mom’s “bedrest”

My 19-month-old son, making a call to Dad

(who–lucky for Mom–is working from home today).

Son needs to explain his missing pants and missing shoe

. . . and how all those Pampers escaped from their box.

For More Wordless Wednesday, hop over to Five Minutes for Mom. And if you’d like some tips for having fun with toddlers while on bedrest, check out my previous post “Doing Fun Things With Mommy on Bedrest.”

My sister got engaged a couple weeks ago and she and her fiance are planning a May wedding in Florida. We (Mom, Micah and I) got to go wedding dress shopping with her while she was in town.

I suppose this wedding-dress-shopping-thing may be once-in-a-lifetime for my little Micahman, so as you can imagine, I took some pictures . . .

He loved looking through the dresses!

And what wedding dress shopping trip is complete (when you’re 17 months old!) without a little dressing-room-peek-a-boo?

He loved the mirrors . . .

Looked in shock at the alteration fees . . .

And stood in awe of the beautiful bride no matter which dress she wore.

He couldn’t help picking up that lacey train.

But after awhile, getting restless, he began to do little-boy things, like looking at his tongue in the mirror. . .

Then he started playing “find-my-belly-button” . . .

And he tried to get the bride to play too. (She didn’t. Just for the record.)

But all in all, we thought he did quite well, wedding dress shopping.

For more Wordless Wednesday, visit 5 Minutes for Mom!

I’m forever looking at clearance sales, with next year in mind.

Last year I found these Halloween PJs at Carter’s for $1.99 each. At that time it was hard to imagine the kids being that size in just a year.

But thankfully, they both still fit, since both kids are on the verge of outgrowing them.

My kids have worn them the entire month. (And I’m fine with them wearing them after Halloween too. After all, they’re just PJs.) So we’re getting our two bucks’ worth out of them.

Micah’s PJs say “Boo!” which is one of the few words he tries to say on a regular basis. Of course, when he says it, it sounds more like “Buh!” but it’s the same idea.

Mara’s say “Wickedly Cute” and I can’t think of two more appropriate words for my crazy little girl!

I took these pictures right after bathtime on Wednesday night. Mara didn’t want me to dry her hair; she said it would dry all by itself in the night. And she kept getting super-frustrated at Micah, who wanted to look at her and talk to her, while she gave her best smiles. She would suddenly flail her arms and say, “Micah! LOOK at the camera!”

We came away with a couple decent shots though.