I wasn’t familiar with this book before having children, but it was listed fourth on the 2001 Publishers Weekly All-Time Best selling Children’s Books list for paperbacks at 6.97 million copies (this doesn’t include the 1 million hardcover copies).

Amazon.com describes the book this way:

The mother sings to her sleeping baby: “I’ll love you forever / I’ll like you for always / As long as I’m living / My baby you’ll be.” She still sings the same song when her baby has turned into a fractious 2-year-old, a slovenly 9-year-old, and then a raucous teen. So far so ordinary–but this is one persistent lady. When her son grows up and leaves home, she takes to driving across town with a ladder on the car roof, climbing through her grown son’s window, and rocking the sleeping man in the same way. Then, inevitably, the day comes when she’s too old and sick to hold him, and the roles are at last reversed.

So: The part I “hate” about this book is the psycho mom “driving across town with a ladder on the car roof, climbing through the window, and rocking the sleeping man.”

I’m imagining here: My mother-in-law lives across town from her grown son, and if she ever did that even once (and, of course, I want to be perfectly clear: she wouldn’t!–I’m just sayin’), my husband would be getting a restraining order!

To me, this segment of the book crosses the line of endearing and borders on the insane. I mean, there are places for people like that. While you read the book, you have to wonder if the son doesn’t turn out “fractious”, “slovenly,” and “raucous” because of the mom who coddles him all his life!

Then there’s the part I love, which I suppose all mothers can relate to on some level. The truth is I can’t even read this book without getting teary at the end, when the son comes back to hold his aging mother and sing her the same song she sang to him all those years.

My son Micah turned two years old today.

He’s been sick and grumpy all week (I would be grumpy too if my eyes were alternately oozing–or glued shut). We’ve all been sick. I’ve been sick and incredibly tired. We haven’t gone out much with everyone sick, so it seems like Micah’s been getting into everything. He’s also been more demanding–even defiant this week, which is wearisome.

This morning, for example, we already had three little episodes before 9 AM. It was quiet for a minute, which of course left me wondering, “What is he doing?”

Just then I saw him pull Love You Forever off the shelf and walk toward me, holding the book up over his face where I could see the title.

“Couch?” he called. “Couch?” (His way of saying: “Come sit on the couch and read it to me!”)

I couldn’t resist. He needs more one-on-one time time, I thought. I had verbally edited this book when I read it to Mara, and as I sat down to read it to Micah for the first time, I was wondering which parts I should leave out for him.

As usual, on the very first page, I was drawn personally into the story, reminiscing about the time, just two short years ago, when Micah was my new (very little) baby.

I snuggled him on the couch while I read: “A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang: ‘I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, As long as I’m living my baby you’ll be.’”

I turned the page. The picture there showed a little boy with a big smile, sitting in a bathroom, unrolling the toilet paper, pulling off sections and throwing them in the toilet.

Largely oblivious to the picture, I continued reading, struck by the parallel to my son’s current stage of life, as I read: “The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. . .”

At this point, my two-year-old had a huge–majorly huge–mischievous grin on his face. So much so, that I was nearly convinced he believed this book was written either about–or for–him! Before I could answer my own question of which parts of the story I shouldn’t read to this child (he certainly doesn’t need any more ideas!), Micah hurled himself off the couch, and announced, “Theeeee End!”

As he scampered off, I looked back down at the book: “. . . Sometimes his mother would say, ‘This kid is driving me CRAZY!’ But at night time when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room . . . [and] sang . . . ‘I’ll love you forever. . .’”

Again, with the tears. I just can’t read stuff like this!

I’ll love you forever, Mic, I thought.

I know. I’m pathetic.

And I don’t know why I was surprised less than an hour later when I found him–yes, my two-year-old–standing at the toilet, the paper unrolled on the floor, throwing pieces in, and flushing over and over and over and over. Did I mention he kept flushing?. . . In retrospect, I’m sure that must have looked really fun in the book! (Add “Tacitly encourages aberrant behavior” to my “hate” column.)

What was I thinking reading that book to him?

But tonight. . .

. . . when my two-year-old birthday boy was quiet, I opened the door to his room. . .

‘I’ll love you forever,’ Micah!

Happy 2nd Birthday!

Please don’t break his heart.

Yeah, I know. Just what a guy wants his mom to say to his girlfriend!

Once again, I should’ve stuck with “Wordless” Wednesday.

But I couldn’t resist.

I love him so much!

But part of me feels guilty.

Micah is now 20-months old and showing a great deal of interest in going potty and major awareness of needing to be changed. In fact, when he’s wet or dirty, you better be paying attention! or he’ll take matters into his own hands.

Mara had already started at this age, because she absolutely hated having a dirty diaper, and would run around like crazy as if trying to escape it. . . In hindsight, I feel like I let Mara start potty training too early, and that caused the whole process to be a lot worse than it needed to be. Her constipation issues also complicated things, but probably if we’d waited she would have done better. And I don’t want to make the same mistakes with Micah.

Besides, he still seems so much younger! Today, for the first time, I heard him say the colors “pur-pur [purple],” “lah-lah [yellow],” and “reh [red].” He just seems so much younger than Mara did as this age–I’m sure it’s just a boy/girl, verbal/nonverbal thing. . . but back to signs of “potty readiness”. . .

I laugh when he pulls his pants down (or off) and lays on the floor to be changed. If that’s not trying to communicate, I don’t know what is! He will stand in the bathroom, while Mara’s on the potty, unrolling toilet paper for her and handing it to her (and yes, I know that’s not a sign, but it makes me laugh too!). Before he goes in his diaper, he will walk around pulling on the front of his pants–he knows it’s coming–then afterwards, he will say ‘diaper, diaper’ and try to go up the stairs to his room to be changed.

This morning, he was walking around, saying, “Poop! Poop! Poop!” and pulling down his pants and his diaper.

For awhile (over the last couple of months), I ignored this kind of behavior, because I figured he was just mimicking things he heard Mara say or do.

But I’m starting to realize: he knows what he’s doing. And he’s trying to tell me something!

I did bring the little potty back up from the basement again–just for these occasions. I figure it doesn’t hurt to at least familiarize him with the little potty concept, if he’s going to be sooo insistent that he needs to go!

So I sat him on the potty for about five minutes, while he beckoned for me to bring him various toys. (Ha ha!) But nothing happened, so I just decided that he didn’t really need to go, and I put his diaper back on and sent him back to play.

About ten minutes later, Daniel walked in the house, pointed at the kids in the living room and said, “One of them reeks!”

Sure enough, it was Micah with a major MAJOR poopy diaper! (Thanks to my dear husband for changing that one!!!!)

Micah really is beginning to understand, but Mom is not ready.

So I can plan to add potty training to this summer’s activities, after my sister’s wedding in May. . .

woo-HOO!

So early on, I talked to her about God’s love for her and told her that Jesus died for her on the cross. We read Bible stories together most every day, and over the past two months or so, she has asked more and more questions and expressed her desire to go to heaven and be with Jesus. She’s asked me how she can stop doing bad things. She has told me how much she loves God and wants to obey Him. So she and I have recently had many conversations about the foundational truths of the Gospel.

Micah is also a little conversationalist–It’s just that I can’t understand 90% of his jabber yet! Plus his attention span is much shorter. His questions much less complex. In fact, while he often asks to pray (several times throughout the same meal and other random times), I don’t know that He’s ever said ‘God’ or ‘Jesus’ at all. I have often prayed for him, told him how much God loves him, and how I pray that he will grow to be a man that loves God more than anything else. But I don’t think I’ve shared the Gospel with him in a deeper way.

That’s okay–his sister did! The other night at dinner, I just listened to this (one-sided) conversation between my three-year-old daughter and her 20-month-old brother:

“Jesus loves you, Micah, and He died for you on the cross. And we want you to love God and obey God, but you do lots of bad things. But God will still love you, even though you do bad things.”

I don’t know how much (if any) of this Micah was really comprehending, but I was amused that her intensity in conversation was matched by his intensity in expression: his jaw literally hung open as he sat there in his high chair, listening to her soliloquy.

“This is really important, Micah,” she finished.

Up until this point, I sat silently, wondering how she would explain these truths, and marveling at the ease with which she shared them.

Then Mara turned to me: “I told Micah all about God. And I started with the Bible.”

Today the Lord encouraged my heart that perhaps someday He will use my little “disciple” to reach others for Him!  I pray that these truths will be real in Mara’s heart–not just reciting things she’s heard–and that her life (along with her words) will continue to point her younger siblings to Christ!

My three-year-old, adding a whole new dimension to Mom’s “bedrest”

My 19-month-old son, making a call to Dad

(who–lucky for Mom–is working from home today).

Son needs to explain his missing pants and missing shoe

. . . and how all those Pampers escaped from their box.

For More Wordless Wednesday, hop over to Five Minutes for Mom. And if you’d like some tips for having fun with toddlers while on bedrest, check out my previous post “Doing Fun Things With Mommy on Bedrest.”

Having a three-year-old daughter with you when you’re on bedrest isn’t all that bad. (It’s the 19-month-old boy I struggle to keep entertained.)

My daughter is forever running into my bedroom, saying, “Mommy, can we do some fun things together?”

And by “fun things” she is referencing the stack of kids’ stuff next to my bed. In that stack I keep things Mara and I can do together while I lay in my bed. (Unfortunately, I have found nothing that Micah and I can do together to add to the stack.)

We have:

• A feltboard: Aunt Darla gave Mara and Micah FeltTales Busy Day at the Farm Story Board for Christmas. This is a great toy for preschoolers! Mara calls it her “cardboard,” and every day she asks, “Can we play with the cardboard?” She pretends the kids are going apple picking; milking the cow (then feeding the cow its own milk out of the pail!); planting the garden; playing with the other farm animals . . . I think it would be a great “travel” toy too. We may bring it next summer when we drive to Florida for my sister’s wedding.
• Candyland: I got this game at the thrift store for 99 cents, in great condition, and it was one of Mara’s Christmas presents too. She is just barely old enough to play this game. It took her awhile to understand that you have to take the top card off the pile (you can’t go through the pile and pick) and that your goal is getting to the Candy Castle–not drawing cards with candy on them, regardless of how far they set you back.
• Memory: Another Christmas present Mara received, conveniently packaged as a hard plastic “book” that can be stored on a shelf. She does pretty well with this game. (I think all kids have to be reminded they can only turn over two cards on their turn, even if they suddenly remember where the match is.) I’m considering dividing the game in half until she’s a little older, because with 72 cards, the game takes a long time and she’s usually yawning halfway through. We have yet to complete an entire game.
• Little Bear and Dress-up Clothes: She was given a little bear with three outfits: cheerleader, cowboy and angel. She loves dressing and undressing the bear, but she can’t do it all by herself, so it’s perfect for both of us sitting on the bed and whenever she needs help, I’m right there.
• Bible Story Books: Mara considers it a special treat to read Bible stories and sing songs together. So I keep those by the bed too. We are flying through the book right now, because we have so much time for reading right now!
• Charts: Mara practices ABCs (letters and sounds) every day. We usually do Bible stories and charts for the first 20 – 30 minutes of Micah’s nap; then Mara goes down for her nap too. She loves doing “charts.” One day I heard her say, “Daddy! Maybe today I can teach you charts!” and she did. He said she got almost all the letters right, except she sometimes mixes up “U,” “V,” and “W.” Daniel would tease her and say, “‘A’ says ‘Buh-Bear’,” and of course Mara would correct him with the right sounds.
• Stickers/Coloring
• Many, many other books: Reading is probably Mara’s favorite pastime!
• Brain Quest for ages 2-3: I was given Deck 3 by a freecycler. I wish I had the next level (Brain Quest for Threes), because Mara whips right through this one, and I think she will get bored with it after a couple times through it. But she enjoys answering the questions and she has learned several things going through it. We use it as a springboard to discuss new concepts (like beavers, building a campfire, or different kinds of insects).
• Girly Stuff: Once a day Mara gets a squirt of body spray (Bath & Body Works’ Black Raspberry Vanilla), and we lotion our hands and put on chapstick. Mara loves girly stuff!

In just a few short weeks (weeks, not days, right??) Mara’s little sister will be born, and we will not have nearly so much time to spend together. So when Mara says, “Can we do fun things together?” I treasure those times!

And if any readers have ideas of “fun things” a 19-month-old boy would enjoy doing while Mom’s on bedrest, I’m all ears! I would love to spend more one-on-one time with him too before this baby comes.

So, tonight, after I turned out Mara’s light, I said, “Nite-nite, sweetie. I had fun with you today.”

Mara said, “Thank you for playing CandyLand with me! It’s fun doing lots of things when you’re on bedrest.” 

That made my day.

I suppose this wedding-dress-shopping-thing may be once-in-a-lifetime for my little Micahman, so as you can imagine, I took some pictures . . .

He loved looking through the dresses!

And what wedding dress shopping trip is complete (when you’re 17 months old!) without a little dressing-room-peek-a-boo?

He loved the mirrors . . .

Looked in shock at the alteration fees . . .

And stood in awe of the beautiful bride no matter which dress she wore.

He couldn’t help picking up that lacey train.

But after awhile, getting restless, he began to do little-boy things, like looking at his tongue in the mirror. . .

Then he started playing “find-my-belly-button” . . .

And he tried to get the bride to play too. (She didn’t. Just for the record.)

But all in all, we thought he did quite well, wedding dress shopping.

For more Wordless Wednesday, visit 5 Minutes for Mom!

It’s basically two days’ drive or a lot of frequent flyer miles, which can be cost-prohibitive, especially when you’re a family of almost 5.

It’s been over a year since I’ve seen my brother and sister-in-law too. They live in South Carolina, which granted is only one days’ drive. But still.

And we got to visit my sister Mary in Florida and meet her boyfriend back in May. And Mary visited earlier this spring too. So far this year, my sister has been the only “family” I have seen. And it is now November.

But all that is about to change.

My brother & sister-in-law arrive on Thursday and get to stay for a week–until Thanksgiving Day. My sister-in-law has a professional exam here in Philly (is it the Certified Financial Planner? I need to ask her!) that weekend, so they are making a “mini-vacation” of it. She has to work the day after Thanksgiving, so we will eat Thanksgiving Dinner for lunch to get them on the road!

My sister is arriving Wednesday before Thanksgiving and staying through Saturday.

My parents are coming in Thanksgiving morning, because my dad will be preaching in South Amboy, New Jersey, on Saturday and Sunday at the church where I spent 10 of my primitive years. Then my mom will stay with us for a little over a week after that!

As I understand it, we will all be together in the same house for about 5 hours or so . . . if all goes according to plan . . . which hasn’t happened since October 2008.

I’ve told the kids about it. Mara understands. She talks to Grandma and Grandpa on Skype, and she knows they’re coming. I’m not quite sure what Micah understands yet.

But lately, he has been going over to the bookshelf, taking down the picture of my family (from our wedding) and pointing to each of the people in the picture and jabbering.

I’m not sure what he’s saying. But I tell him who each person is, and that they’re coming for a visit. And he actually looks at each person with interest.

So, wow, I will catching up with some people I love!

And my little boy, who has only met his Grandma and Grandpa once, will get to know them in a closer way than just a picture on the bookshelf.

Last year I found these Halloween PJs at Carter’s for $1.99 each. At that time it was hard to imagine the kids being that size in just a year.

But thankfully, they both still fit, since both kids are on the verge of outgrowing them.

My kids have worn them the entire month. (And I’m fine with them wearing them after Halloween too. After all, they’re just PJs.) So we’re getting our two bucks’ worth out of them.

Micah’s PJs say “Boo!” which is one of the few words he tries to say on a regular basis. Of course, when he says it, it sounds more like “Buh!” but it’s the same idea.

Mara’s say “Wickedly Cute” and I can’t think of two more appropriate words for my crazy little girl!

I took these pictures right after bathtime on Wednesday night. Mara didn’t want me to dry her hair; she said it would dry all by itself in the night. And she kept getting super-frustrated at Micah, who wanted to look at her and talk to her, while she gave her best smiles. She would suddenly flail her arms and say, “Micah! LOOK at the camera!”

We came away with a couple decent shots though.

She knows the policy.

When I reminded her, she ran to the stairs, and faster than ever, Mara was on the potty. Before we knew it, she was back downstairs in the dining room asking again for her special treat.

Daniel and I happened to look over at Micah. He had watched the whole interaction with great interest and was now pulling furiously on his diaper.

Completely seriously, Daniel said, “Maybe he needs to go potty too. Take him!”

I was incredulous!

“You can’t be serious! He’s not even 17 months old. Mara was several months older when she started potty training. Besides he’s a boy, and boys take longer to learn than girls do, and good grief! he can’t even feed himself out of a spoon without flinging food around the dining room! Do you really want to have to teach him about aim already? . . . ”

But Micah’s insistent pulling on his diaper won Daddy over. “At least, let him try.” Then Daniel switched his approach: “Wouldn’t it be nice to get him potty-trained before the baby comes?!”

“Oh, yes. So you take him,” I said. “I know nothing about training boys!” Naturally, I ended up taking him. I took off his diaper (which was wet) and set him on the potty.

Unlike Mara at this age, he was not at all afraid to sit there on the “big potty.” In fact, he looked quite pleased with himself. I tried my best to encourage him. But nothing happened. He just sat there. And seemed completely at peace with the whole scenario.

Then, after several seconds of sitting quietly, he reached for the toilet paper. And I realized what was happening.

He was getting himself a “special treat,” just like he had seen his big sister do, probably hundreds of times!

He hopped right off the potty, I put a clean diaper on him, and when we went back downstairs, he did exactly what I expected him to do: headed straight for the jar of Special Treats!

I gave him one anyway.

After all the trouble he went to and how perfectly he understood the routine, it seemed like he should get some sort of reward!

“He’s not ready yet,” I said to Daniel. “He wants Special Treats. Maybe you should be the stay-at-home-dad!”